swing swing from the tangles of my heart.

Taking part in the two programs: Program Sahabat Unisel for the 400 Form 5 students from schools all over Selangor and the English Camp for Form 1 & 2 students of a boys school in Klang, I have gained a new perspective on things. I remember when I was just in Foundation, I was oh-so-eager to go out and teach. But as the years go by, I got less and less enthusiastic and more nervous. I felt I would never ever be ready.

When Asep told us we had to start scouting for schools we would like to do our practicum at, I felt overcome with these feelings of shock, worry, panic, and anxiety. I felt somewhat angry. I half-wished they would just assign us somewhere with someone so we wouldn't have to choose ourselves. Making choices is difficult. Sometimes, I think it's just better to not be given such power.

Our practicum is sometime early next year. I'm too overwhelmed to think about anything right now. It all still feels like this big tangled mess and I wish I could just put off straightening it all out right now...
 
The Program Sahabat Unisel was held last saturday. We had to help lecturers teach English to a class of 20 students. The day started out crazy and hectic. It felt like everything was going wrong but things turned out okay in the end. I still had tonnes of fun and it was delightful watching my friends with their hairs combed back clutching their notes and looking all smart and teacher-ish. It felt like we were running a school of our own! Oh boy now wouldn't that be fun? haha!

Teaching in a classroom can be very constraining as opposed to the English camp we had on Friday. We practically ran the whole thing and it was awesome! When the students arrived in the morning we took them to the sports center (IPIS) to play a series of language games Explorace style. Two of us fascilitators would be assigned one group (7 to 8 kids). These groups would have to run around IPIS collecting points at each station. Me and my partner Janaa were assigned to group Ben10 and booth number 10 where we had a whispering game using tongue twisters for them. One group was given the tongue twister 'Six Sick Sheep', and when it reached the end, it turned out as 'Six Sit Shit'. Yes, SHIT! I couldn't help laughing! But when it all ended and Varan asked them which booth they liked the most, I heard cries of 10! Hehe... I'm glad they had as much fun as I did.

My group won fifth place, which to me is pretty good. I'm proud of them all for trying their best. When went up on stage to do the war cry, our kids watched us from below, and they clapped and I could feel that they were as proud of their kakak/abang/cikgu and even sir, as we were of them. When we went to send them off to their bus, my captain gave me and Janaa some of our groups' prize. I told him it was for them and that me and Janaa could share but he insisted. It was really sweet of him to do that. I hope they remember us and this English camp forever. It's hard not to grow attach to them :)

Well, who knew a bunch of Form 1 & 2 kids would actually be the ones to take my breath away and help me feel better about things. I will always be the nervous, anxious, panicky me about practicum and going out for the real deal, but now, I've also gained my enthusiasm and excitement back. Thank you boys.

and thank you guys for making this experience the best one yet. Best of luck to us next year! I hope we never burn out. I hope we will always be awesome like this and I hope that, where ever we go, we go with all our hearts :D

 to infinity and beyond!